how to get skinny again

so you know how everybody was buzzing about how Heidi Klum, lost all her weight and got into diamond encrusted thong 3 months after she had a baby??? So i went to this website called the skinny website which has all these celeb mothers who give their weight loss secrets and Gwynth paltrow said breast feeding melts away the pounds and she lost 1 lb a day breast feeding - and i'm like ummmm, was that between hour 3 and hour4 of your workout. becos no, breast feeding making you lose weight is like an urban legend. unless i'm doing it wrong!!!!!!!!

i actually feel fatter oh wait no, its just becos my tummy is smaller (marginally)and i can finally see my big fat hips!!!!!!!! so we 'glow' during our pregnancy and are just plain fat afterwards and dont let no celebrities tell u otherwise.

i've been hitting the treadmill and asking husband am i any thinner? huh? huh? every evening and he's like erm, since when? morning - no, no improvement.

Sigh